Constructing Identity

During this past week (albeit it's only Tuesday) I've come across two things that have really struck a chord with me. 

This link will provide the article for the possible lift of ban of gays in boy scouts - http://inamerica.blogs.cnn.com/2013/01/28/boy-scouts-reconsidering-policy-against-gay-membership/

And this link will direct you to a site for girls in which one of the games you can play is "Nerdy Girl Makeover." 

http://www.girlsgogames.com/game/nerdy_girl_makeover.html

When I first read through the story on the boy scouts I was outraged. Maybe it's just my own wishful thinking that these sort of things aren't an issue anymore, but it just seems outrageous to me that they wouldn't be allowed to be in this type of organization. In the article they discuss that even if the ban is revoked at the national level, locally, chapters will still be able to set their own rules. Many of the chapters who are sponsored by the churches run the risk of having their funds taken away, which has often times been the main concern. I think that many of us may not be surprised by the church reactions at this point, but what I was surprised to hear about was the "hundreds of angry Eagle scouts renouncing their hard-earned awards and mailing back their red-white-and-blue medals." What I have wondered and continue to wonder, is how the presence of gay members can possibly detract from their successes. It's upsetting to me to know that people who are so close minded that fail to see the harm in which they are causing other human beings. In looking at gender identity theory, which is discussed in Identity and Intercultural Communication - Chapter 5, Martin&Nakayama, comes down to what it means to be a man or woman. What does it say to boys who are being denied membership to the boy scouts? By denying membership to the gay community they are denying them what it means to be a male. They are making clear statements that these people are less of men because they like the same sex and to be honest, at this point I can't see any quality in this organization of "men" that gives them the power to decide what qualities of a man is acceptable and what is not. 

The next link I posted is to a site of games that are created for girls. The one in particular that I played was the Nerdy Girl Makeover. In this game (play for yourself if you'd like) you are literally asked to change everything about the original "nerdy" girl in the picture, down to her eyebrows. What is possibly worse than the actual game is the comments. One of the comments read "I helped my nerdy friend get a boyfriend." Obviously stereotypes of what it means to be a nerd come into play here, but again we can look at the bigger picture and what it means to be a girl. Socially, we have constructed this idea that what it actually means to be a girl, and when you deviate from that meaning, you end up being branded. These games only further perpetuate these differences among girls. It seems necessary to again look at gender theory and even identity theory. Discovering your identity is an issue that is felt by all and many times what most of us are trying to do it just fit in. Culturally we have defined what it means to be a girl, and as Gloria E. Anzaldua, discusses in Borderland La Frontera, she notes that women are meant to feel failures if they don't want to get married or have children. Where did we get these notions that define us as women? Who's telling us that in order to be a woman we have to wear lots of makeup and bear children? And probably wear lots of makeup while bearing children... 

But more importantly, how do we start changing these cultural norms?